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Thursday, November 11, 2010

Birth - A Man's Perspective (Part 4)

Stage 3-B: Labor & Delivery (In the Hospital)


So we made our way back to the hospital.  The mid-wife called ahead for us and our mission was accomplished... we had waited long enough that we skipped triage and went straight into a labor and delivery room.  Well, almost straight in.  First was the stop at the desk to give ALL your personal info to the lady behind the desk.  Tiffany is now sitting in a chair having contractions every 2-3 minutes and the lady insists "I know honey, just a few more questions".  As she asked the last question (from her that is, no where near the actual last question) our mid-wife walked in.  We were lead to our room.  Finally!  It's really happening now, we are in the room where we will see our son.  I'm thinking just another 2 may be 3 hours at the most now.  It's 2 pm, if I remember correctly.  Could be a little earlier.  We get our first of 4 or 5 nurses that we would go through.  She continues the questions.  I try to answer them all, but apparently she just didn't get it.  She insisted on directing every question to Tiffany even though I kept answering them all.... um... hello, she's in labor and I'm just standing here.  I will be glad to answer your questions for you.  thank you :)  In between the barrage of questions the nurse and mid-wife both yell to the other nurse in the hall "I'll have a sundae".  Wait, what?  My wife is in late stages of labor and you're ordering ice cream...  We found out the following day they come around every afternoon and apparently not even delivery can keep these women from getting their ice cream.  Tiffany kept her breathing very steady, normal and deep as we had learned.  None of this special breathing stuff which can lead to hyperventilation.  Tiff was up and walking around and leaning on me during contractions. 

Then it came, only 30 minutes or an hour into being at the hospital.  The urge to push.  Exam, 9 cm.  Crap.  Ok we'll wait.  May be 15-30 more minutes.  Ok, I have to push.  Exam, still about 9 cm, but probably ok if you want to push.  Ok we're pushing.  (hindsight is 20-20, too early to push).  This is where it gets fun.

We're now pushing, ok sorry, Tiffany is pushing.  I'm moral support.  But we're in this together and I'd argue (with Tiffany's agreement) she couldn't have done this with out me.  So yes, we're pushing now.  The mid-wife and our second nurse (i think we're on nurse two now) are very encouraging.  We're prepared, pushing can take anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours for a normal pregnancy.  We're shooting for the 30 minute mark, but that came and went.  We're in different labor positions.  The mid-wife says we're making progress (I think now she was lying to us).  The hour mark slides by, the 1.5 hour mark slides by, we're now around 2 hours of pushing with each contraction every 1.5 -2 minutes.  I can see the toll it's taking on Tiffany and her energy.  The mid-wife tells us we're making progress, I can't see any.  I don't think Tiffany can feel any.  This is when I start to realize our 'typical', 'normal' birth may not be.  I'm a little nervous at this point, but still under control and calm.  Tiffany appears as though it's not phasing her a bit.  No worry or anything.  All business. 

Calling a Dr. is now mentioned... I think by us.  We're asking, how much longer will you let us go without intervening.  (usually hospitals will only allow you to be in the pushing phase for 2 hours max before intervening).  Our mid-wife continues to stall us, knowing that we don't want to call the Dr.  She knew our birth plan, and knew we were only asking out of fear or whatever it was, so she stalled us.  I am very thankful for that.  We decided around 2.5-3 hours to hook Tiffany up to an IV to get some pitocin to make the contractions stronger.  This will help in pushing Zac out... and it did.  15-20 minutes in, after the pitocin was increased, I saw the little guy's head.  I thought surely we're home free.  But that was it as far as the progress goes for another 30 minutes probably (i'm not sure if my time is adding up correctly).  This is about where I lost it.  I was pissed.  Mostly with God.  Why are you putting my wife through this.  This is painful, this is exhausting.  STOP IT PLEASE!  I mean, she's been pushing somewhere around 3hrs or a little more now.  It's never freaking going to end!  Tiffany very calmly (she was very calm in between contractions, and even calm during them) asked me what was the matter ( I admit it, I was crying).  what... she's asking me what's wrong?  That's right, she was so strong through the whole thing!  I was/am so very proud of her.  The decision is made for the doctor to come in.  I'm back in control of myself now.  Just a little 5 minute lapse there... I'm entitled, Tiffany was too, but she chose not to have her moment... just as well.  The Dr. explains our options in between contractions.  We choose the vacuum.  Zac was basically turned and not coming on his own.  Vacuum was the best option we thought vs c-section, which no body really thought was necessary and the vice grips, or whatever they are.  So the Dr. prepares the vacuum, it's not what I expected.  No hoover or anything.  A simple, manual suction tool.  3 pushes and Zac is out!  We have son!  Dr. screams NICU... man they are there in 30 seconds.  They look like the cast from The Big Bang Theory and they're in the corner with Zac only talking amongst themselves.  Zac is crying, he's breathing, he's ok, they're sucking his poop out of his lungs (he had the meconium stuff going on, like father like son).  Tiff and I have a moment to rejoice, to relax.  The Dr. starts stitching her up.  We talk with him.  It's actually a very pleasant conversation and atmosphere.  He left a bible study to come deliver Zac... they're all praying for the delivery.  God is good.  I was screaming and cussing at him earlier, He makes sure to take the time to reassure me He was in this.  He's got this.  He knows what He's doing.  I apologize to Him and thank Him.  My God is good.  Our plans changed some in this story, but His never did. 

Zac is clean now and I get to go check him out.  Um... excuse me, can someone tell me if his head will ever be normal?  There's a ring from the vacuum, not to mention his head is a cone!  Yea yea, that will all take care of itself.... Ok, but I'm putting this beanie on his head when I take pictures so people won't notice :)  You will not find a picture from the hospital without that beanie on his head, I mad sure of it that such a picture does not exist.  I was worried about this, it was kind of creepie I will admit (I hear all babies come out that way, and it is normal now, well as normal as mine anyway). 

Ahhh... relief.  We're done.  7.30 pm on Sunday.  Haha, yea right.... we didn't leave the hospital for another 45 hours....

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